A change

Found love beyond all reason,
You gave you life your all for me, And called me yours forever!
Today I live for one thing, to give you praise in everything I do!

Today morning was scary. I went to visit my favorite girl Aiyin and on the way back, I sat in front of a gila man :z He was spouting vulgarities 3 times/min. And it was the same vulagirity : NNBCCB. Which made me jump out of my seat because he kept shouting it suddenly. So when it finally reached my stop I ran down the bus hahaha.
Sorry for the hiatus, shall move to my new blog very soon! 🙂

How to save a life

Shit, being upset makes me look ugly on the outside. I look so haggard all day and my eyes just don’t look normal! And looking at myself makes me even more upset! I think I need to do something to save my stupid face, like sleeping really really early. I’m thinking of getting a new piercing soon, with Chloe! Super excited about it, but I shall not reveal anything until it’s done 🙂 Awww, we’re not going to Spooktacular after all because the early bird offer flew away 😦 (pun intended) I initially thought of dressing up as a pumpkin!
Like:

Or maybe as a stuffed olive like:

Nah, just kidding.

I’m currently in desperate need of cash, but I can’t work during the holidays because of my results 😦 I hope I can participate in lots of flea markets so that money can come rolling in. Next I’ll need to better manage my money!! And I’m highly anticipating Christmas, because it’s the season to be jolly! Everyone who knows me well knows how much I loveeeeee Christmas! Haha, just talking about it makes me wanna groove.

Off to dinner, adious!

You’re a murderer.

Throughout today, I was just on the verge of bursting out into tears. Today as my mother went to see Miss Tay, a lot of things were running in my mind.
I’m really angry with myself for allowing myself to fall sick during the crucial promos period because of a particular selfish person. I’m angry at myself for believing that it would last. I’m angry with myself for accepting. I’m even more angry with myself for inflicting guilt upon myself. There are somethings I’ve done that I really cannot forgive myself for. I really hate myself for being blinded by ‘trust’. And it sucks even more because I cannot tell anyone at all or I would just die of disgust, embarrassment and guilt. And saying that all of it was an insult is merely an understatement.
I really don’t know when I will stop being this sickening sullen creature. I guess I’m officially tired of life and everything it has been throwing at me of late. I wish I could just leave everything behind and go to somewhere far and never look back. Sometimes, just sometimes, death seems to be the easier way out. I really hope all these pass soon.

P.S: Don’t judge me, I’m just saying how I truly feel. People always tell me “seriously, why are you still thinking about this” I would give anything to stop feeling so down. The thing is, I can’t. So stop judging me.

She will be loved

Beauty queen of only eighteen
She had some trouble with herself
He was always there to help her
She always belonged to someone else

I drove for miles and miles
And wound up at your door
I’ve had you so many times but somehow
I want more

I don’t mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved
She will be loved

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful
I know I tend to get so insecure
It doesn’t matter anymore

It’s not always rainbows and butterflies
It’s compromise that moves us along, yeah
My heart is full and my door’s always open
You can come anytime you want

Tap on my window knock on my door
I want to make you feel beautiful

I don’t mind spending everyday
Out on your corner in the pouring rain
Look for the girl with the broken smile
Ask her if she wants to stay awhile
And she will be loved

I’m on my way to believing

(taken some weeks ago)

Why are you trying so hard to show me that you don’t care? Seriously, it’s unnecessary -.-
OH HAHA, I just succeeded in talking my mother into buying me contacts. Double yay!
Today morning my mother told me to go to the market to get her some Pandan leaves. You know Pandan leaves always have worms or leeches hiding amongst the leaves. My mother always screams when she washes them, and I always laugh at her. HAHA now it’s my turn. But anyway I quickly picked a few bunches and asked the auntie to chop off the dirty part. Mission accomplished 🙂
I should take better care of my complexion. It’s so depressing to see ugly marks all over my forehead 😦 And I really need to lose more weight. Damn it, my appetite seems to be back ever since the chalet started. I must start doing something to lose the idiotic weight again.
Anyway,Yay, I finally snapped some photos using my Holga! I can’t wait to see how the photos will turn out. I’m hoping it would be amazing~ Cos I used it to capture Bella’s birthday celebration. The chalet was pretty enjoyable to me, even though I spent most of the time in the room lying on the bed HAHA. Chalet makes us lazy doesn’t it? And the thing is even though I slept a lot, my eye lids are closing as I type this 😦
Today is the last day of going to my ah ma house 😦 Sad 到爆. I have a strong affinity for it cos I grew up there and it’s like my second home where everyone gathers and have fun every Sunday. I took it for granted because I never considered the fact that it can’t belong to us forever 😦 But I’m gonna have fun there today so yay.

Anyway, there are things that I wouldn’t talk about even with my boyfriend so why would I wanna tell a stranger like you!!!!! I’m saying that you’re not my cup of tea/coffee. Plus, I know you’re not even serious and I’m just another girl you’re interested in -.- So you should just stop flirting and give up on me. Irritating like hell. Shit, I should really learn how to be harsh to ppl!

Okay, I got to go SP to support my mother now so 1…2…3 bye!

I’ll never be the same, if we ever meet again

Oh damn 😦 I have sore eyes and they are bloody bloody red. And I keep rubbing my eyes so my skin feels like it’s gonna tear any moment. I look so terrible I wanna hide myself in my room 😦 But then there’s BBQ tmr 😦 Even thought it’s a 4E2 BBQ, I still like to chap in as long as Bella’s there. I think one of the things I find joy in is irritating bella! Hurhurhur. Bella is the funniest and the most irritating person I’ve ever met by the way. We have this same idea that every single thing on earth has a certain value of humour in it. For example, on rainy days, the trees look silly to me cos they look like they’re dancing happily in the rain. Haha, I know you don’t get it! But Bella and I find it really funny 😉
Hmmm, I hope my eyes get well soon enough to look pretty, haha. Imma rush out of the school to go meet claudia for lunch, and then off to Bella’s chalet 😀 COS I Love BELLA MUCH! Giving away her present doesn’t mean I don’t love her hahahahaha.
Anyways, I’m renting a Diana F+ to get a feel of the effects! Super excited, I’ve been wanting to own a Diana F+ for eons. Shall ask chloe to go along with me. Yay~
Shit, I need to do I&R now. So bye bitches 😦

The way it unfolds is yet to be told

Oh, I woke up at 11 today and didn’t go to school today 🙂 As far as I remember, It’s the first time in my entire life that I woke up so late. It’s because I spent my entire night watching movies in my phone and only slept at 5 hahaha
Anyways, I’ve been doing research and came up with a list of places to visit/eat! Yay, I shall start sending invites to ppl to join me in my adventures. My schedule is very tight okay, so if you wanna book me better hurry 🙂 And I also made up my mind to start a collection of toy cameras. My Holga has been sitting in my room collecting dust. So, time to take it out for some shots 🙂 I’m anticipating the many plans waiting for me~ Especially the Hokkaido trip! AND I finally found the perfect boots for me to wear to Japan. WTH, must get it soon.

On a random note, I think I shall ditch this stupid emotional blog for a livejournal soon 🙂 & it shall be a photographic documentation of my life. Alrighty, bye pumpkins 🙂

Don’t tell me you’re sorry cause you’re not.

Why can’t you co-operate when I’m trying to make lives easier. Why do I have to find out a little more something bad about you everyday. Your lies, your character, your attitude. If anyone has anything to hide from me, please ensure that it is safely hidden. I’m sick of accidentally finding out about the lies you weaved so well. And also, the face to face apology/explanation is needed even after everything I said. Till then, we’re quits.

P.s: I think I’ve met the most horrible person in my life.

In the name of love

Yay, Di after today you happy alr lor! I wanna go for a short getaway now leh. Like go bintan or something. Really need a break to get away from all the hustle and bustle of life. PW really sucks to the core by the way.
Oh recently ,I only drink pearl milk tea for the whole day. I know it’s unhealthy, but I can’t help it. I feel so disgusted with myself when I gobble something down. And even if I’m hungry, somehow I forget the hunger soon. Wth, really need to change. This is probably too extreme right!

Oh, and Happyhappyhappy birthday to Du Qun 🙂

Let the good times rolllll~

Damn delicious right!!!!!

this is me answering my mother’s phone call. She always calls and screams at me, but I find it pretty funny leh =x Cannot put to full size for this photo cos my arms are humongous 😦 &I really like my new bag, even though it’s pretty out of shape in this photo (L)

Today at 6:21am
I received a heart warming text from Ddy :
Good morning to my most beautiful pui girl. K bye going back to zzzzleep.
(Btw ddy, don’t act idiotic. I’m not yours -.-)
And thank God I was woken up by his text, if not I’d be sleeping like a log and be late for school since I slept so late yst 😦 It’s all Di’s fault that I couldn’t sleep by the way, always like to disturb disturb. But I will forgive him since he always cheers me up.

Anyway, I decided that I shouldn’t make my life so miserable. So I choose to forget everything bad lor. Heehee, was really upset yst but I’m fine now 🙂 So this week, I’ve alr made 3 trips to FEP. Shit, I spent too much on clothes 😦 But on a happier note, I got so many new things to wear muahahaha. On the last trip, Ddy was behaving like a joker. Normally, everyone around me would ask me to not eat so much. But but but Dd you kept going around buying and stuffing me with food. And blabbering nonsense like: Bitch, fat is hawt.
Well, I don’t know how I managed to be convinced by him that day. Oh, did anyone realise I slimmed down??? So pleased with myself heehee.
OH I JUST REMEMBERED SOMETHING. That irritating D was acting cute the other day. He was irritating me, so i made weird noises at him loudly(My habit if you all still don’t know) He xia dao and thought I was really irritated. Then all of a sudden he became so tamed. He said in a soft and gentle voice: Honey I luv you, hughug mwahmuack -inserts sad face- (inside joke la) But I immediately eeyer-ed him, oops. I thought it was rather funny though ❤

By the way, Ddy does not stand for Daddy okay. Don't anyhow assume .-. Ddy is just my gootgoot joker friend.
YAY can't wait for the zi char feast ~ 🙂

Sian, PW is back & I absolutely dislike it 😦 Such a waste of time, seriously -.- Just now I went to see the chinese physician to find out the reason why my hands have been numb for two days. And it was due to some spine problem. And then he was there cracking my bones. It sounded so scary! But at least my hands aren’t that numb now. PW causes time crisis, hate it ttm.
K time to do PW 😦 Bye pumpkins~